To those who have ever doubted God in any way,
I've done that, too. I'm not proud of it, but the truth is that sometimes, I worry that God doesn't have everything under control, that maybe He forgot about me, or that He's not going to fulfill His promises... And what a load of baloney that is! What a remarkable waste of time! Truly, as Joseph Scriven wrote, "Oh what peace we often forfeit; oh what needless pain we bear, all because we do not carry everything to God in prayer"!
But tonight, what I write to you (and to me!) is not "yeah we all doubt God sometimes." Instead, I want to encourage you to push past the doubt, to choose to trust in our Lord, to put your faith and trust in our loving Savior. God is faithful. We can rest in His promises.
Today, I spoke with a second-year student about something that I tend to worry about every so often, and I could hear God saying, "I didn't forget. I have everything under control. And I had planned ahead for you, even before you began to worry." And I was so humbled and so amazed by how good God is. Especially in the past week, I've been seeing that God truly has gone before me, preparing different people and circumstances just for me.
I also got a text today from a dear friend. It was so genuine and so uplifting--such a testament to God's perfect timing. Had I not been in a relatively public place, I would have cried (happy tears!). The story is that when I sent her a book for her birthday, I timed it to arrive on Friday (her birthday's on Saturday, but I wanted to make sure it wouldn't arrive late). I got an email that the book shipped early, that it would likely arrive today, so I made a mental note to tell her to hang onto it until this weekend. Well, as God worked it out, I completely forgot to tell her "save it for Saturday!" and she opened it today. Turns out it was the exact thing she needed at the exact time she needed. She told me that even after just 5 pages, God was using the book to shape her heart. And I was just so blessed and so humbled to be part of her life story.
It's so amazing to me that a year ago, I had no idea what my future held, but God had everything planned. And I know that choosing to trust God instead of worrying about my future won't always be easy; but today, I choose to have faith. I choose to believe that God is in control and has the very best planned for me, above whatever I could ever ask for or imagine. I pray that today, you also choose to rest in our Savior, because He is good... always, always good.
In His love,
-Alyce
Thursday, October 25, 2012
Friday, October 12, 2012
"See You Later"
Dear ___,
We've only been friends for about a month, and already I can't fully articulate all the ways God has blessed me through you, or the way you have impacted my heart. But I wanted to say thank you for having an open heart, for being obedient to our Savior, for letting His light shine through you, for being His hands and feet.
And pretty soon, you're leaving, and I'd be completely sad about it if I wasn't happy that you'll be getting some amazing experiences. I'm going to miss you a TON (so please come back and visit me once in awhile).
You are someone I was excited to meet even before I heard your name. See, when I started grad school, I knew God was going to bring people into my life who would leave a lasting impression on my heart, people who would show me more of His character, people whom I could not imagine life without--and I was absolutely beyond excited to find out who they were. You, my friend, are one of those people. I am so blessed to call you friend.
A long time ago, when I was incredibly shy and slow to let people into my life, my youth pastor taught me something: I could choose to let others into my life, love them, build amazing relationships with incredible people, and grow--and sign up for a heart-wrenching "goodbye"; or I could choose to forego all of it to "protect" myself from such a sting.
For the most part, I've continually chosen the former, which means I've had to part ways with many people I love dearly, not knowing the next time our paths would cross... but I'm still terrible at goodbyes, and I still really wish I never had to say them. But praise God that I've learned that people are worth it... I am so very thankful that you are in my life! What's more, praise God that in Him, "goodbyes" are really "see ya later"s!
So to wrap it all up... GIRL I'M GONNA MISS YOU SO MUCH. But I'm eternally grateful that God put you in my life, and I'm so glad that I know you. You told me that your name means beautiful... and you are beautiful, inside and out. I pray that you continue to pursue Jesus with everything you are, and I can't wait to see what huge things He does next in your life. Thanks for sharing life with me... and seriously, let's make sure to visit each other every now and then. Love you, sister.
God's abundant grace to you,
-Alyce
We've only been friends for about a month, and already I can't fully articulate all the ways God has blessed me through you, or the way you have impacted my heart. But I wanted to say thank you for having an open heart, for being obedient to our Savior, for letting His light shine through you, for being His hands and feet.
And pretty soon, you're leaving, and I'd be completely sad about it if I wasn't happy that you'll be getting some amazing experiences. I'm going to miss you a TON (so please come back and visit me once in awhile).
You are someone I was excited to meet even before I heard your name. See, when I started grad school, I knew God was going to bring people into my life who would leave a lasting impression on my heart, people who would show me more of His character, people whom I could not imagine life without--and I was absolutely beyond excited to find out who they were. You, my friend, are one of those people. I am so blessed to call you friend.
A long time ago, when I was incredibly shy and slow to let people into my life, my youth pastor taught me something: I could choose to let others into my life, love them, build amazing relationships with incredible people, and grow--and sign up for a heart-wrenching "goodbye"; or I could choose to forego all of it to "protect" myself from such a sting.
For the most part, I've continually chosen the former, which means I've had to part ways with many people I love dearly, not knowing the next time our paths would cross... but I'm still terrible at goodbyes, and I still really wish I never had to say them. But praise God that I've learned that people are worth it... I am so very thankful that you are in my life! What's more, praise God that in Him, "goodbyes" are really "see ya later"s!
So to wrap it all up... GIRL I'M GONNA MISS YOU SO MUCH. But I'm eternally grateful that God put you in my life, and I'm so glad that I know you. You told me that your name means beautiful... and you are beautiful, inside and out. I pray that you continue to pursue Jesus with everything you are, and I can't wait to see what huge things He does next in your life. Thanks for sharing life with me... and seriously, let's make sure to visit each other every now and then. Love you, sister.
God's abundant grace to you,
-Alyce
"So much more binds us together than keeps us apart... The number of days and weeks we are together isn't important; what really matters is the way God knits our hearts together during the time He chooses for us to be in one another's lives." - Katie Davis, Kisses from Katie
Saturday, September 8, 2012
Jesus Loves Me
Anyone who has ever experienced spiritual truth via a toddler,
Isn't that a funny, humbling feeling? The fact that a tiny tot can nonchalantly make a declaration that moves the core of your being... for real, "Out of the mouths of infants and nursing babies You have prepared praise." (Psalm 8:2, Matthew 21:16)
A few weeks ago, I was with some people who are not biologically related to me, but are practically family. All their children are wonderful, but the youngest is the biggest character, by far. He's only three, but oh my goodness... the child is something else. Adorable, incredibly smart, life of the party, happy and funny kid... and like a lot of children, a tell-it-like-it-is, no-filter nonstop talker. And since I've known him since he was born and babysat him so many times since then, I'd like to go on record as saying I'm in his fan club. I just love this kid.
So this one day I came for a visit, and as soon as I walked in the door, this child was clamoring for my attention, which meant I had to split my attention between him and his mother (with whom I was actually trying to hold a conversation). Finally, he got tired of having to constantly interject into our conversation to make himself heard, and he decided that he wanted me all to himself. He grabbed my hand and began dragging me to another room, at which point his mother said with a laugh, "I'm sorry, he's just really excited that you're here; you don't have to go with him." I responded with, "Oh, it's no problem; I love kids."
Of course this precious child heard my comment. And without missing a beat, he looked me square in the eye, and with a big grin, loudly declared, "You love ME!!!"
At this point, his mother and I burst out laughing--she, because of his audacity; I, because I didn't know what to say. In between gasps, I managed, "Yes, yes I do."
But in that moment, I was so moved. This kid knew that I loved him. He was so confident, he could naturally, easily say it loud and proud. And immediately I knew that God was using this child--who isn't even mine--to show me something of what He feels when His children delight in His love.
I don't claim to know much, but what I do know for absolute certain is the simplest, yet most profound truth: Jesus loves me. Perfect God the Father loves perfect God the Son with perfect love... and with that love, Jesus loves me. Regardless of all of my imperfections, despite all of my shortcomings... Jesus loves me! He chose me; He died for me; and because He lives, I have life, abundant life... now that's incredible.
So now, all I can do is rejoice.
I stand in wonder and in awe, breathing in this amazing truth:
Jesus, You love me.
Friends, there is no way that I could ever fully communicate the love of God, but it is my prayer that you also experience the width and length and depth and height of the love of Jesus Christ.
Blessings,
-Alyce
Isn't that a funny, humbling feeling? The fact that a tiny tot can nonchalantly make a declaration that moves the core of your being... for real, "Out of the mouths of infants and nursing babies You have prepared praise." (Psalm 8:2, Matthew 21:16)
A few weeks ago, I was with some people who are not biologically related to me, but are practically family. All their children are wonderful, but the youngest is the biggest character, by far. He's only three, but oh my goodness... the child is something else. Adorable, incredibly smart, life of the party, happy and funny kid... and like a lot of children, a tell-it-like-it-is, no-filter nonstop talker. And since I've known him since he was born and babysat him so many times since then, I'd like to go on record as saying I'm in his fan club. I just love this kid.
So this one day I came for a visit, and as soon as I walked in the door, this child was clamoring for my attention, which meant I had to split my attention between him and his mother (with whom I was actually trying to hold a conversation). Finally, he got tired of having to constantly interject into our conversation to make himself heard, and he decided that he wanted me all to himself. He grabbed my hand and began dragging me to another room, at which point his mother said with a laugh, "I'm sorry, he's just really excited that you're here; you don't have to go with him." I responded with, "Oh, it's no problem; I love kids."
Of course this precious child heard my comment. And without missing a beat, he looked me square in the eye, and with a big grin, loudly declared, "You love ME!!!"
At this point, his mother and I burst out laughing--she, because of his audacity; I, because I didn't know what to say. In between gasps, I managed, "Yes, yes I do."
But in that moment, I was so moved. This kid knew that I loved him. He was so confident, he could naturally, easily say it loud and proud. And immediately I knew that God was using this child--who isn't even mine--to show me something of what He feels when His children delight in His love.
I don't claim to know much, but what I do know for absolute certain is the simplest, yet most profound truth: Jesus loves me. Perfect God the Father loves perfect God the Son with perfect love... and with that love, Jesus loves me. Regardless of all of my imperfections, despite all of my shortcomings... Jesus loves me! He chose me; He died for me; and because He lives, I have life, abundant life... now that's incredible.
So now, all I can do is rejoice.
I stand in wonder and in awe, breathing in this amazing truth:
Jesus, You love me.
Friends, there is no way that I could ever fully communicate the love of God, but it is my prayer that you also experience the width and length and depth and height of the love of Jesus Christ.
Blessings,
-Alyce
I am so glad that our Father in Heav'n
Tells of His love in the Book He has giv'n;
Wonderful things in the Bible I see,
This is the dearest, that Jesus loves me!
Sunday, August 26, 2012
"New Woman"... at life
To those interested in the happenings of my first week of graduate school,
Thank you for asking, for encouraging, for caring. It means so much to have so many of you remember me in your thoughts and prayers. I'm sorry I'm terrible at consistently updating you all on the details of my life, but I truly am thankful for you!
So how was my first week? Well... [warning: this is about to be more of a "novel" than a "letter]
Every day felt like "oh my goodness, it's the first day of school!" Yep, I went to school every day feeling like everything was happening for the very first time.
Nevermind that I did my undergrad here.
Nevermind that there are just as many familiar faces as unfamiliar ones.
Nevermind that I'm pretty good at school.
Because I have never been a teaching assistant (TA) before.
Because I have never been an administrative assistant (AA) before.
Because I've never been an AA to three different people before.
I had extremely vivid flashbacks to my "new woman" year at PMO. (Those of you who don't know what that means--your first year at PMO, you are a "new man/woman," and you pretty much don't know a thing. You keep your "new" status until the beginning of the next year, when there is a whole new class of "new men and women" who don't know what they're doing.) As a new woman, there was so much that I didn't know. There were tons of things expected from me--none of them were particularly difficult; it was just the sheer quantity that was somewhat overwhelming. And sure, there were plenty of PMO folks who were very much on my side and wanted me to succeed, but they could only "teach" and prepare me so much... the rest I had to learn as it was happening. (PMO friends, you know exactly what I mean!)
So... as a first-week, first-year grad student, I felt like a new woman... at life. I loved my classes, my professors, my classmates, and the second-years, but the TA/AA responsibilities on top of it all were pretty overwhelming. Nothing I had to do was difficult in retrospect, but being assigned things that I'd never been taught how to do until 30 seconds before actually doing them... not my cup of tea. I like having a plan, a schedule, an outline, an instruction manual... funny how life doesn't always work that way. Friday morning, I woke up and said, "I still have one more day before the weekend???"
Grad school is exhausting (can you tell?). But praise God that He's put me in a field I love, and that He carries me! Because as crazy, stressful, and tiring as this week was... I loved it! Especially the beginning of the week, when we kept hearing/saying "first year students", "the second years", etc... I felt like I was at Hogwarts.--and getting our clinical placements was very much like being sorted into Houses. Oh, and the second years bake really well... in grad school, I might gain the weight that I didn't gain in undergrad. Haha!
This week, I tried this new thing... actively choosing to remain unstressed. Firstly, I figured that there would be 15 more weeks to truly stress out. Secondly, and more importantly--in my weakness, God kept reminding me to cast my cares upon Him, because He cares for me. (I Peter 5:7) Even today, God reminded me that He is my strength, my fortress and refuge when I am distressed (Psalm 59:16-17).
Eeep! I just had a very "spiritual linguistic nerd" moment... "De-Stress and Distress: Jesus is the Difference"... wouldn't that make a fantastic sermon/workshop title? Haha but seriously...
Sorry, I'm starting to ramble. Friends, if you're still reading, thank you for sticking it out with me! In so many ways, I'm blessed to have you :)
So to wrap it all up: I think I really do love grad school. And as overwhelming as everything is, I'm choosing not to be overwhelmed. I don't know what tomorrow holds, but I know Who holds tomorrow. As much as I don't like being in the position of "not knowing," I love that God is using this experience to show me how good and gracious He is. And if "not knowing" is what He uses to draw me closer and make me more like Him, then so be it... He is truly more than enough!
Blessings,
-Alyce
Thank you for asking, for encouraging, for caring. It means so much to have so many of you remember me in your thoughts and prayers. I'm sorry I'm terrible at consistently updating you all on the details of my life, but I truly am thankful for you!
So how was my first week? Well... [warning: this is about to be more of a "novel" than a "letter]
Every day felt like "oh my goodness, it's the first day of school!" Yep, I went to school every day feeling like everything was happening for the very first time.
Nevermind that I did my undergrad here.
Nevermind that there are just as many familiar faces as unfamiliar ones.
Nevermind that I'm pretty good at school.
Because I have never been a teaching assistant (TA) before.
Because I have never been an administrative assistant (AA) before.
Because I've never been an AA to three different people before.
I had extremely vivid flashbacks to my "new woman" year at PMO. (Those of you who don't know what that means--your first year at PMO, you are a "new man/woman," and you pretty much don't know a thing. You keep your "new" status until the beginning of the next year, when there is a whole new class of "new men and women" who don't know what they're doing.) As a new woman, there was so much that I didn't know. There were tons of things expected from me--none of them were particularly difficult; it was just the sheer quantity that was somewhat overwhelming. And sure, there were plenty of PMO folks who were very much on my side and wanted me to succeed, but they could only "teach" and prepare me so much... the rest I had to learn as it was happening. (PMO friends, you know exactly what I mean!)
So... as a first-week, first-year grad student, I felt like a new woman... at life. I loved my classes, my professors, my classmates, and the second-years, but the TA/AA responsibilities on top of it all were pretty overwhelming. Nothing I had to do was difficult in retrospect, but being assigned things that I'd never been taught how to do until 30 seconds before actually doing them... not my cup of tea. I like having a plan, a schedule, an outline, an instruction manual... funny how life doesn't always work that way. Friday morning, I woke up and said, "I still have one more day before the weekend???"
Grad school is exhausting (can you tell?). But praise God that He's put me in a field I love, and that He carries me! Because as crazy, stressful, and tiring as this week was... I loved it! Especially the beginning of the week, when we kept hearing/saying "first year students", "the second years", etc... I felt like I was at Hogwarts.--and getting our clinical placements was very much like being sorted into Houses. Oh, and the second years bake really well... in grad school, I might gain the weight that I didn't gain in undergrad. Haha!
This week, I tried this new thing... actively choosing to remain unstressed. Firstly, I figured that there would be 15 more weeks to truly stress out. Secondly, and more importantly--in my weakness, God kept reminding me to cast my cares upon Him, because He cares for me. (I Peter 5:7) Even today, God reminded me that He is my strength, my fortress and refuge when I am distressed (Psalm 59:16-17).
Eeep! I just had a very "spiritual linguistic nerd" moment... "De-Stress and Distress: Jesus is the Difference"... wouldn't that make a fantastic sermon/workshop title? Haha but seriously...
Sorry, I'm starting to ramble. Friends, if you're still reading, thank you for sticking it out with me! In so many ways, I'm blessed to have you :)
So to wrap it all up: I think I really do love grad school. And as overwhelming as everything is, I'm choosing not to be overwhelmed. I don't know what tomorrow holds, but I know Who holds tomorrow. As much as I don't like being in the position of "not knowing," I love that God is using this experience to show me how good and gracious He is. And if "not knowing" is what He uses to draw me closer and make me more like Him, then so be it... He is truly more than enough!
Blessings,
-Alyce
Jesus loves me! This I know,
For the Bible tells me so.
Little ones to Him belong;
They are weak, but He is strong
Yes, Jesus loves me!
Yes, Jesus loves me!
Yes, Jesus loves me!
The Bible tells me so.
Monday, August 20, 2012
1,560
Dear Friends,
Today I officially made Facebook friendship #1,560. (Before I say more, let it be known that I am neither boasting nor pretending to be popular; I have been "defriended" many times. Plus, most of my life most definitely does not find me "popular".) But what really "got" me was that, as staggering as that number is to me personally, that's not even fully representative of all the people in my life. Many aren't on Facebook, and many more I have yet to even meet!
But, friends, when I look back and see how God has used some of you to shape my life, I'm dumbfounded. I'm amazed, because prior to your friendship changing my life profoundly, it's not like I had some kind of gaping hole in my life; but after the fact... there are so many of you who I can't imagine not knowing. I look back and wonder, why did we not become friends sooner?? Of course, the answer is God's sovereignty: He knew that I needed you at that point in time, and that in the future I'd appreciate you that much more.
Back to the 1,560 thing. I cannot believe that I know so many more people than the number reflects. Moreover, all of you are made in God's image, yet each one of you is unique and reflects a different aspect of God's character. And I'm awed by the fact that, unless Jesus calls me home, I will meet so many more people in the years to come, people who will further shake up my life and reveal Jesus even more clearly to me. And in those years, I will wonder again and again at how I thought my life was so full without them. (Because even now, I'm feeling so very blessed and loved by those in my life, and I can scarcely imagine more.)
I guess this is part of what Jesus meant when He said, "I came that they may have life and have it abundantly" (John 10:10). The truth is that without His goodness, I wouldn't know you all.
Thank God for you, friend.
I looked back today and thought, I've come a very, very long way. But the truth is that I couldn't have done it without you. So, regardless of whether you're in the 1,560 or not... thank you for being part of my life.
-Alyce
Today I officially made Facebook friendship #1,560. (Before I say more, let it be known that I am neither boasting nor pretending to be popular; I have been "defriended" many times. Plus, most of my life most definitely does not find me "popular".) But what really "got" me was that, as staggering as that number is to me personally, that's not even fully representative of all the people in my life. Many aren't on Facebook, and many more I have yet to even meet!
But, friends, when I look back and see how God has used some of you to shape my life, I'm dumbfounded. I'm amazed, because prior to your friendship changing my life profoundly, it's not like I had some kind of gaping hole in my life; but after the fact... there are so many of you who I can't imagine not knowing. I look back and wonder, why did we not become friends sooner?? Of course, the answer is God's sovereignty: He knew that I needed you at that point in time, and that in the future I'd appreciate you that much more.
Back to the 1,560 thing. I cannot believe that I know so many more people than the number reflects. Moreover, all of you are made in God's image, yet each one of you is unique and reflects a different aspect of God's character. And I'm awed by the fact that, unless Jesus calls me home, I will meet so many more people in the years to come, people who will further shake up my life and reveal Jesus even more clearly to me. And in those years, I will wonder again and again at how I thought my life was so full without them. (Because even now, I'm feeling so very blessed and loved by those in my life, and I can scarcely imagine more.)
I guess this is part of what Jesus meant when He said, "I came that they may have life and have it abundantly" (John 10:10). The truth is that without His goodness, I wouldn't know you all.
Thank God for you, friend.
I looked back today and thought, I've come a very, very long way. But the truth is that I couldn't have done it without you. So, regardless of whether you're in the 1,560 or not... thank you for being part of my life.
-Alyce
Sunday, July 29, 2012
Road Trip
To the Brothers and Sisters with whom I spent the last few days,
How privileged I am to have you in my life! I am truly overwhelmed by how you love with God's love, and I am so very encouraged by your gracious spirits and genuine sense of community. What started as a "personal road trip" became an awesome series of encounters with God, and I am so grateful that you allowed yourselves to be used by Jesus.
It was so incredibly difficult to leave this morning--it hurt, like was like I was leaving a piece of my heart behind. But at the same time, I was rejoicing and thankful for God's goodness. By the afternoon when I was telling my pastor about my time with you all, it was too much to handle... I don't usually cry a lot, but I think today's "cry count" is at 4 (though I should say that the crying was mostly happy tears). Anyway, I just wanted to make sure you all knew that I carry you in my heart, and I am remembering you with joy before our Savior.
-Alyce
How privileged I am to have you in my life! I am truly overwhelmed by how you love with God's love, and I am so very encouraged by your gracious spirits and genuine sense of community. What started as a "personal road trip" became an awesome series of encounters with God, and I am so grateful that you allowed yourselves to be used by Jesus.
I have learned so much from all of you: through you, God has convicted, challenged, humbled, and encouraged me in ways that I cannot adequately express. Thank you for so graciously making time for me, for loving me... for being the Body of Christ and ministering to me in ways I didn't even know I needed. You have given me a fuller perspective on worship and a deeper understanding of the love of God, and I can't thank you enough.What made us friends long ago
When we first met?
Well I think I know,
The best in me and the best in you
Hailed each other because they knew
That always and always since life began
Our being friends was part of God's plan.
– George Webster Douglas
It was so incredibly difficult to leave this morning--it hurt, like was like I was leaving a piece of my heart behind. But at the same time, I was rejoicing and thankful for God's goodness. By the afternoon when I was telling my pastor about my time with you all, it was too much to handle... I don't usually cry a lot, but I think today's "cry count" is at 4 (though I should say that the crying was mostly happy tears). Anyway, I just wanted to make sure you all knew that I carry you in my heart, and I am remembering you with joy before our Savior.
I don't know when I'll see you all again, but please know that I love you all dearly and I look forward to next time. I was so blessed to share life with you and hear what God has been doing in and through you, and I can barely wait until the next time we get to share how He is growing us.“You can kiss your family and friends good-bye and put miles between you, but at the same time you carry them with you in your heart, your mind, your stomach, because you do not just live in a world but a world lives in you.” – Frederick Buechner
God's richest blessings to you,“The most beautiful discovery true friends make is that they can grow separately without growing apart.” – Elizabeth Foley
-Alyce
Thursday, July 5, 2012
Blessings
Dear Brothers and Sisters of NY Summer Conference,
I am beyond blessed by the outpouring of love that has happened over the last five days. I cannot thank you all enough for speaking truth into my life, for encouraging, for challenging, and for loving.
The truth is that before the conference, I was hurting, and also so spiritually dry--my quiet time with Jesus was essentially nonexistent, I didn't have anyone who was pouring into me, and although I was being pushed to serve, I was burnt out to the point of not wanting to serve.
Long story short, God used all of you to bring about a process of renewal in my life. Through the work of the Holy Spirit, I was convicted of sin, brought to confession and repentance, and restored to our Savior. And because you allowed God to work in you, I was so encouraged and so blessed. I was able to witness the power of prayer and the greatness of our God; I saw the enormous effect of the obedience of God's people; I was humbled by your willingness to be vulnerable and share your lives with me; and my heart to serve and pursue our Lord was refreshed. And in a God-sized paradox, the more I gave, the more I had; the more I served, the more strength I had to continue serving; and the most joyful moment was when I was broken and weeping before the Lord.
Finally, I have one particular thank you that goes out to the amazing women through whom God brought healing and hope to me. I am so grateful for the time we spent together; God truly used you to inspire, nurture, challenge, convict, and encourage me. Thank you for being in my life, and for letting me be in your lives. Whenever I think of you, I am always amazed by God's graciousness, and my heart is filled with worship and praise to Him.
Thank you all again for allowing God to use you.
May the love of Jesus continue to permeate every aspect of your lives.
- Alyce
I am beyond blessed by the outpouring of love that has happened over the last five days. I cannot thank you all enough for speaking truth into my life, for encouraging, for challenging, and for loving.
The truth is that before the conference, I was hurting, and also so spiritually dry--my quiet time with Jesus was essentially nonexistent, I didn't have anyone who was pouring into me, and although I was being pushed to serve, I was burnt out to the point of not wanting to serve.
Long story short, God used all of you to bring about a process of renewal in my life. Through the work of the Holy Spirit, I was convicted of sin, brought to confession and repentance, and restored to our Savior. And because you allowed God to work in you, I was so encouraged and so blessed. I was able to witness the power of prayer and the greatness of our God; I saw the enormous effect of the obedience of God's people; I was humbled by your willingness to be vulnerable and share your lives with me; and my heart to serve and pursue our Lord was refreshed. And in a God-sized paradox, the more I gave, the more I had; the more I served, the more strength I had to continue serving; and the most joyful moment was when I was broken and weeping before the Lord.
Finally, I have one particular thank you that goes out to the amazing women through whom God brought healing and hope to me. I am so grateful for the time we spent together; God truly used you to inspire, nurture, challenge, convict, and encourage me. Thank you for being in my life, and for letting me be in your lives. Whenever I think of you, I am always amazed by God's graciousness, and my heart is filled with worship and praise to Him.
Thank you all again for allowing God to use you.
May the love of Jesus continue to permeate every aspect of your lives.
Praying God's richest blessings upon you all,"It's not about putting Jesus first. It's putting Jesus in everything."
- Alyce
Sunday, May 27, 2012
Ten Words
To my Future Hubby,
Um, hi. It's me. And it feels REALLY weird writing like this, because I don't know who you are, if I've met you yet, or if you even exist. Of course, I really hope you do exist... and one day, that "someday" when we realize we are meant to spend every day together, we're going to pursue Jesus together.
So this thought process was prompted by the fact that today, I watched the loveliest video:
Um, hi. It's me. And it feels REALLY weird writing like this, because I don't know who you are, if I've met you yet, or if you even exist. Of course, I really hope you do exist... and one day, that "someday" when we realize we are meant to spend every day together, we're going to pursue Jesus together.
So this thought process was prompted by the fact that today, I watched the loveliest video:
...and I was so inspired. You know, I want this to be us, someday. I want you to be an "Andy", and I want to be your "Sonia." Let's have adorable things to say to and about each other; let's be hysterically entertaining in our impressions of each other; let's doodle "couple pictures" (and I hope you are a better artist than I am).
But the thing I want most to be true, the thing I hope best defines our relationship, is what Sonia said at the 5:48 mark:
"Your love helps me to understand God's love for me."
Wow. I don't think I could come up with something that succinct and that powerful. She's a Proverbs 31 kind of woman, the kind of woman I aspire to be.
And he is a 1 Timothy 3 kind of man. Even though right now I don't know who/where you are, I know that by the time we end up as til-death-do-us-part "us," that'll be you, too.
Can't wait to see how God writes our story.
-Alyce
Saturday, May 19, 2012
Behind the Musician
Dear Parents, specifically those whose children have attained any level of musical proficiency,
Thank you for putting up with us.
The past two weeks or so, I've been helping my little cousin with his piano lessons. Bless his heart, but I'm almost completely sure that this child does not have any raw musical talent. To say that helping him practice is exhausting, is an extreme understatement. As I watched him leave to go to his piano lesson, all I could think was, "Dear Lord, if he doesn't pass "Oom Pa Pa" this week, and we have to practice it for another week, I just might lose my mind." For the record, since we practiced it to death, he did pass (and I maintained my sanity for another day).
And then I thought about how all the children in my immediate family had to learn that very same song as we began piano lessons, which led me to think about my parents. While my siblings and I all have a good amount of musical talent, they still had to listen to "Oom Pa Pa" and the like... hundreds of times. They also put up with the occasional tantrums that came with getting us to practice, chauffeured us to and from lessons, and attended many a painful recital. And this was on top of forking over thousands of dollars in instruments and lessons.
Eventually, their hard work paid off: after almost ten years, I learned to love piano, and I've since learned several other instruments on my own (fortunately, my siblings all learned to love their instruments much earlier). In high school, I became a pianist at church and at school, and my siblings and I headed up the praise team at church. When I went to college, my siblings continued the praise team, and my sister filled my spots as pianist (might I add, she is so much better than I ever was). And when I come home to visit, there is a lot of good music-making that happens. Right now, I am obsessed with a cappella: today, I just finished arranging my second a cappella piece, and it's SO much fun to be able to write and arrange what I want.
But like I said before... this was an eventual process. None of us sounded good at first, and my parents had to put up with a LOT before we (1) sounded good, and (2) became motivated to play/practice on our own. Right now, I'm listening to another cousin practice. Thankfully, she's good--better than I ever was. But her parents (especially her dad) definitely still has to sit with her as she practices; she hasn't yet developed that kind of work ethic for herself, and there are excuses galore. And I'm a little awed by my uncle's patience.
So THANK YOU, and a huge round of applause for my parents and every parent who has "stuck it out" with music lessons. I, for one, appreciate it deeply--I don't know what I would do if I wasn't able to make music. In fact, music has been so critical in making me who I am today... and it's probably even safe to say that music has saved my life. I know this gratitude is severely delayed, but from the bottom of my heart, thank you. It's because of you that I and others are able to sing, play instruments, write songs, or arrange pieces. And one day, if I have children of my own, I will remember what you did; because of you, I will suck it up, put a smile on my face, and hope for the best as I listen to the thousandth rendition of "Oom Pa Pa".
-Alyce
Thank you for putting up with us.
The past two weeks or so, I've been helping my little cousin with his piano lessons. Bless his heart, but I'm almost completely sure that this child does not have any raw musical talent. To say that helping him practice is exhausting, is an extreme understatement. As I watched him leave to go to his piano lesson, all I could think was, "Dear Lord, if he doesn't pass "Oom Pa Pa" this week, and we have to practice it for another week, I just might lose my mind." For the record, since we practiced it to death, he did pass (and I maintained my sanity for another day).
And then I thought about how all the children in my immediate family had to learn that very same song as we began piano lessons, which led me to think about my parents. While my siblings and I all have a good amount of musical talent, they still had to listen to "Oom Pa Pa" and the like... hundreds of times. They also put up with the occasional tantrums that came with getting us to practice, chauffeured us to and from lessons, and attended many a painful recital. And this was on top of forking over thousands of dollars in instruments and lessons.
Eventually, their hard work paid off: after almost ten years, I learned to love piano, and I've since learned several other instruments on my own (fortunately, my siblings all learned to love their instruments much earlier). In high school, I became a pianist at church and at school, and my siblings and I headed up the praise team at church. When I went to college, my siblings continued the praise team, and my sister filled my spots as pianist (might I add, she is so much better than I ever was). And when I come home to visit, there is a lot of good music-making that happens. Right now, I am obsessed with a cappella: today, I just finished arranging my second a cappella piece, and it's SO much fun to be able to write and arrange what I want.
But like I said before... this was an eventual process. None of us sounded good at first, and my parents had to put up with a LOT before we (1) sounded good, and (2) became motivated to play/practice on our own. Right now, I'm listening to another cousin practice. Thankfully, she's good--better than I ever was. But her parents (especially her dad) definitely still has to sit with her as she practices; she hasn't yet developed that kind of work ethic for herself, and there are excuses galore. And I'm a little awed by my uncle's patience.
So THANK YOU, and a huge round of applause for my parents and every parent who has "stuck it out" with music lessons. I, for one, appreciate it deeply--I don't know what I would do if I wasn't able to make music. In fact, music has been so critical in making me who I am today... and it's probably even safe to say that music has saved my life. I know this gratitude is severely delayed, but from the bottom of my heart, thank you. It's because of you that I and others are able to sing, play instruments, write songs, or arrange pieces. And one day, if I have children of my own, I will remember what you did; because of you, I will suck it up, put a smile on my face, and hope for the best as I listen to the thousandth rendition of "Oom Pa Pa".
-Alyce
Rememberies
Dear Self,
For the most part, I don't write letters to or about myself. I think it's kind of weird that this is happening. But there are just so many thoughts swimming around, and nowhere really to put them, so...
Speaking of weird, how is it that your undergraduate career is over already? I don't think it's really "hit you" yet--probably because you're sticking around for a graduate degree--but I'm sure it will, soon. And you may or may not have a quarter-life crisis when it hits.
But once it finally sinks in, I want to make sure that you don't forget about how amazing undergrad was. Not that I think you will forget, but you do have this knack for not reminiscing often and just blazing ahead (examples: how often do you really think about junior year? or sophomore year? or freshman year? or... dare I say the words... high school?).
The thing I think I want you to remember most, then, isn't really a thing. And it's more of a plural "it." I want you to remember the people: all of the amazing people who you couldn't even have dreamed up, yet now a life without them seems impossibly boring. I have a feeling that, due to sheer quantity, a good number of your amazing memories probably not last the test of time; but I hope that you will take the time to look back every now and again, and affectionately remember the beautiful people who inspired you. They absolutely changed your life and helped you become more of who God always intended you to be.
Let me correct myself a little: those lovely individuals should be your second most-recalled entity. The first should be the grace and mercy of God. May you always remember the bottom line that you did absolutely nothing to deserve all of the extraordinary people and amazing experiences that made your collegiate career; may you always be humbled and awed by the blessings that God has so graciously bestowed upon you. In so many ways, both great and small, God has used everything in the last four years to change you, to grow you. There is still a lot that I don't know, but I know that there will be many, many days in which you will experience something and say to yourself, "God prepared me for this during college."
So may you always do justly, love mercy, and walk humbly.
May you always choose to pray, rejoice, hope, and love.
And may you always pursue the Savior.
-Alyce
For the most part, I don't write letters to or about myself. I think it's kind of weird that this is happening. But there are just so many thoughts swimming around, and nowhere really to put them, so...
Speaking of weird, how is it that your undergraduate career is over already? I don't think it's really "hit you" yet--probably because you're sticking around for a graduate degree--but I'm sure it will, soon. And you may or may not have a quarter-life crisis when it hits.
But once it finally sinks in, I want to make sure that you don't forget about how amazing undergrad was. Not that I think you will forget, but you do have this knack for not reminiscing often and just blazing ahead (examples: how often do you really think about junior year? or sophomore year? or freshman year? or... dare I say the words... high school?).
The thing I think I want you to remember most, then, isn't really a thing. And it's more of a plural "it." I want you to remember the people: all of the amazing people who you couldn't even have dreamed up, yet now a life without them seems impossibly boring. I have a feeling that, due to sheer quantity, a good number of your amazing memories probably not last the test of time; but I hope that you will take the time to look back every now and again, and affectionately remember the beautiful people who inspired you. They absolutely changed your life and helped you become more of who God always intended you to be.
Let me correct myself a little: those lovely individuals should be your second most-recalled entity. The first should be the grace and mercy of God. May you always remember the bottom line that you did absolutely nothing to deserve all of the extraordinary people and amazing experiences that made your collegiate career; may you always be humbled and awed by the blessings that God has so graciously bestowed upon you. In so many ways, both great and small, God has used everything in the last four years to change you, to grow you. There is still a lot that I don't know, but I know that there will be many, many days in which you will experience something and say to yourself, "God prepared me for this during college."
So may you always do justly, love mercy, and walk humbly.
May you always choose to pray, rejoice, hope, and love.
And may you always pursue the Savior.
-Alyce
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